Saturday, June 4, 2016

{ Taking the back seat }

Just a quick post to share my heart and keeping it real.

Taking a "back seat" can be so hurtful. Do you ever feel like others think of everybody else before the thought of you even comes to mind.....
unless they want or need something? 

Yeah, me, too.  

I've been on my "pity pot" lately.  

Do I have a right to feel this way? 
Yes, by the world's standards.  
But as I ponder my hurt heart and those who have hurt me I realize just how much they need the Lord. I have Him to comfort me and love me and speak to me about my worth in Him.  
They don't seem to have that.  
But, who am I to judge?

This is one of the ways that Satan uses to really "get my goat". Rejection is something none of us want to have to endure, especially when the ones rejecting us should be those who love us the most. I've played "second fiddle" to my younger brother my entire life.....
well, his entire life.....
and I don't see that ever changing.
(I'm almost in dread hearing what the will reads, if you get my drift).

Because of how I was "raised", I've NEVER felt one ounce of worth. And, because of rejection by family and friends it's wreaked havoc with my self esteem. It's caused me to have such high expectations from others, wanting them to understand like I try to do for them.

Prayers for all of you who are enduring something similar. And, PLEASE don't feel sorry for me. That's not the intention of these words. I just KNOW that there are others reading this who know where I'm coming from. I understand and I ache for you, too.



(I'm turning off comments for this post because again, it's not for compassion or sympathy.....
just trying to be transparent)